A lot of people out there feel like they will never find love. They have a nagging feeling that maybe they are "doomed" to be alone forever, or maybe they are too "flawed" to be loved—and that, my friends, is a very painful thing to feel. You need to believe you are a worthy person. I want you to believe that you deserve to be loved and to find a romantic partner that will cherish you. Stop thinking the bad moments or words because this generate bad emotions and will affect everything around you. You need Get rid of the fear of being forever single, because it is just that: a fear, an emotion that you have about yourself, a belief about your future—not reality.
Here are 7 ways to help you see things the way they really are:
1. Stop Criticizing YourselfTake an honest look at how often you put yourself down during an average day. How often do you criticize yourself by telling yourself things like: I'm so stupid. I'm too fat. I'm too old. I'm ugly. I'm damaged goods. I always screw things up. I'm an idiot. And so on and so forth. Rings a bell? Well if you talk to yourself in this way, your mood will drop, your fears and insecurities will increase, and you are basically conditioning yourself to believe you are an unworthy person. Your thoughts have a direct impact on how you feel.
It's simple. Think good things: feel good. Think bad things: feel bad.
2. Feel Good About YourselfThis cannot be said enough. Imagine you walked into a car dealership and the salesman told you he had a car for you. He says, "Well, it's kinda old and beat up. It still runs, but it's high on gas, there's a few scratches on the paint, and I'm not sure how reliable it is." Now, how much would you want to buy that car? You'd be out of there in a New York second and looking for something better in no time, I'm quite sure. Why? Because if the person selling you the car doesn't even believe in the quality of the car, why should you?
3. Realize You Have Something Valuable to OfferWhat are some of your great qualities? Are you an honest, hard-working, sensitive person? Are you an athletic, artistic, family-oriented individual? Are a relaxed, easy-going person, or an organized, efficient person? Not only can you find someone who shares the same interests and qualities that you hold, but you can also complement (not complete with!) your future partner by bringing in your own strengths to the relationship.
4. Change the Way You Think and Feel About the Opposite SexSo many individuals hold false beliefs about the opposite sex. Because you've had bad experiences, your way to appraise the opposite sex has changed.
What are the beliefs you hold about the opposite sex? Do you think things like:
- All men are jerks.
- Men only want sex.
- Men fear relationships.
- Men can't be faithful.
- All women are gold diggers.
- All women are emotional explosions.
- All the good ones are taken.